So I have quite a headache that every 2-3 flashes my ecu bricks. Once bricked I attempt to put it in boot mode, mpps can't read the ecu and therefore can't flash the file. This is when things get weird though, after I try all that to recover ecu the car will start. After it starts I can reflash. Is this normal??

depends what tool are you use and what kind of ecu you have , as far i know in AXR seems to be a bug and if you have a cheap china tool you have 80% chance to brick it

Then the cheap cable I'm using is the culprit. What cable are most using?

Hi,
Yes, depends on the ecu and tool, but more important is the soft adecuad.
There are good, average and bad Chinese tools

Besides a quality tool, don't forget to keep the battery connected to a stable charger to keep it above 13vdc.